The Boldness of Knowing + Surprise... I'm Getting MARRIED!!!
“Believe that anything is possible.”
In May I drove to Melbourne and around Tasmania with those words stuck to my van’s interior. I read them every morning when I woke up.
“Believe that anything is possible.” It was a print of a painting by Stephanie Ryan.
At the time I was on a journey with my beloved dog Jordie, my dearest companion of 16 years. We were having her last harrah, as it was clear she was nearing the end of her days. Before then, I’d taken her for walks and let her off the leash on the oval of my small town, imagining what my life would be like when she was gone. Trying to prepare for how I would cope.
When the time came, I explored the Beauty of Gentle Transitions and found Lacey Jane, my gorgeous Cavoodle puppy. She’s been growing up these past few months and I’ve been growing too. Challenging my own presumptions of what is possible in this life. Discovering that what is possible is more than I dared to dream.
I’ve hinted at it in past blog posts, but I’m so happy to share this news with you… I’m deeply and resoundingly in love with a truly incredible man, Andrew.
He’s undoubtedly the Love of My Life.
The way it happened, was I joined eHarmony as a bit of a giggle, just to meet some men and perhaps make a few new friends (I work with and love spending time with lots of women, but I wasn’t meeting any men out here in the country) and low and behold I fell in love. With a man who truly loves me too.
Now, if you’re wondering how long it takes for your life to turn around, we met after sharing emails and phone calls over a period of weeks, got engaged after spending just eight days together and we’re getting married next week!!!
It sounds extreme, to be moving so fast, but it’s been so grounded right from the beginning and old-fashioned in our courtship’s solidarity it’s been truly wonderful. Especially since neither of us were looking to get married, until we met each other that is.
For a while we kept expecting to wake up and freak out one morning, wondering what the heck we were doing, but instead it’s kept growing stronger, even more solid and even more beautiful. We’re both so happy and amazed to have actually found each other.
Is anything really possible?
Perhaps anything is possible when you know your heart’s desire, set a date, and give yourself the support you need to make things happen. We’ve pulled together a wedding and planned a honeymoon within a month. And perhaps most incredibly, it’s been beautiful. Simple. Easy. Ridiculously fun. And joyful.
We’ve told our friends and family. Surprisingly, none have fainted or been overly shocked. In fact, some have said they weren’t surprised at all.
I’ve ordered three simple wedding dresses online. I’m trusting at least one will arrive in time for the big day. The others I’ll wear on intimate dinner dates with close family and friends around the county to celebrate our marriage after the ceremony.
We’ve ordered the rings. They should be ready a couple of days before the wedding.
We’ve booked a beautiful venue where we’ll say our vows and make promises to each other under a tree, with a handful of people we love as witnesses.
But really, I don’t care if the dresses don’t arrive or aren’t perfect, or that the engagement ring will only be on my finger for a couple of days before we marry, or even what other people think. I just can’t wait to be married to Andrew. To be his wife.
It’s not something I ever thought could happen, that I’d fall this hard, fast and so surely.
But we just Know.
There is a beauty and boldness in just Knowing. Loving. Stepping out. Taking a risk. But do you know what? The risk we’ve both felt was in not following our hearts in this case, which are saying, “This is it. You have found him/her. Leap!”
The Boldness of Knowing…
I’ve found there’s something incredibly freeing, stable and productive that comes from Knowing. And leaping. But leaping with a sense of Knowing.
When I think about it, so many of the great things in my life have come about from a sense of Knowing. Before the outcome could be guaranteed; buying a house in the country; planting a garden; holding my first art exhibition; booking flights anywhere overseas; enrolling in courses such as Bschool; getting engaged.
And this time, it’s getting married. We just Know. Nothing has ever felt more natural. Which has come as a surprise to both of us. We just fit. We are so compatible it makes our heads spin. Sometimes it’s not really about time passing in life, it’s about Knowing.
But it wasn’t quite as linear as that. Not as straight forward.
We both cleared our clutter first; emotionally and physically. We got clear on the kind of partner we needed and wanted (I’ve dated a lot of men over the years and found what does and doesn’t work for me). Andrew knew he needed an independent woman. Which, you may have noticed, I am. Then, we put ourselves out there and took action, sometimes in ways that felt uncomfortable, such as writing an online dating profile.
We truly are soul mates. And I didn’t even believe in soul mates until I met Andrew!
For a girl who’s lived, travelled, worked, gardened, and dreamed alone for such a large part of her life, it’s a wonderful, surprising twist in the story I’ve told myself would likely be my future.
I thought I’d be a spinster. Someone who had many relationships, but never a soul-mate. Someone who intimidated the socks off most men. Someone who was so independent I wouldn’t fit into another person’s life. I thought I would probably continue dating a weird and wonderful string of professions; salesmen, artists, musicians, gypsies, preachers, teachers and cleaners and possibly, only if I was lucky, find someone who would fit into my life for a short season before we’d inevitably move apart again.
But, instead, I’ve found Andrew, who’s had a life as unconventional as mine. We’ve both lived on boats and on islands. In fact he’s lived all around the country, from the Pilbara to Mole Creek. He’s worked in over 35 different jobs, is excellent at what he does, has a massive beautiful heart and a set of values I truly admire.
I’ve never met a man I respect more. Which is really saying something. I’m so honoured I’m going to be his wife, and so thrilled he’s going to be my husband.
We just Know it’s the best thing for us. And we can’t wait.
We laugh. We love nature. We draw together, write together, read together. We really, truly, actionably and deeply love each other. And we are prepared to work together, and support each other in developing a relationship and life together where we each feel safe, cherished, and able to shine at our best.
What I find interesting, in looking back, when my health was teaching me to listen to my body and my heart, I couldn’t see much more than trying to get through the next meal without excruciating inflammation. I couldn’t see how I could transform my health and life by planting a garden.
When my dog was dying, I didn’t see how I could have a new family before Christmas. But a few days ago Andrew and I took Lacey Jane for a walk, and as they played on the oval where Jordie used to run, I saw my new little family, ready-made and here, now.
Being open to life’s twists and turns, listening to your heart, checking in with what feels true for you in your body, and being brave to take action are some of the lessons I’ve found have helped shape a life I adore and keeps evolving into a bigger, brighter, better version of what’s possible. What excites me, is the opportunity to help shape a world where others enjoy what’s possible to create their own bigger, brighter and better lives and health too.
Living your own unconventional life…
If you want to live an Unconventional Life, where you call your own shots, choose your own path, march to your own drum, and follow your heart, I’ve found you will need a few things along the way:
Following a deep sense of Knowing what is good for you
A touch of ‘who cares what other people think’ perspective
Faith you’ll be supported by the Universe no matter what
Willingness, determination and persistence
Spontaneity isn’t essential, but I’ve found it is a by-product of knowing & trusting yourself and leads to all kinds of wonderful experiences
We are getting married next week (!!!) and then heading away to Thailand for our honeymoon. So to celebrate, I’m offering a Honeymoon Special this month on The Abundant Veggie Patch System! Get all the details below…
Remember, “Believe that anything is possible.” Following your inspiration, taking action and stepping out to create a life, relationship or garden you love is so, so worth it.
You’ll get to know Andrew over the coming weeks, months and years too. He’s truly wonderful. I just love him to bits, and he loves me to pieces.
I’m sure you’ll like him too.
With love,
Nicola xx